Thursday, September 15, 2005

Where's My Bliss?!!?

In this few recent weeks, I have been working like a mad dog. It saps my energy to exhaustive level and leaves me with little to amuse myself. Weekends are usually my off day, but recently I've also been working on weekends. On top of that, my nights too are filled with work. Due to the enhancement that I've been planning to implement, I have no choice but to comply. Well, at least it's better than the time when trouble arose and I had to stay till midnight to try to rectify the problem. The odd thing about that day was while going back on that night, although already pretty late, yet there was a jam piled up near my workplace! I soon found out that it was due to a soccer match held at the stadium nearby whereby the match had ended not too long ago. What a day that was. Somehow despite my emotional rollercoaster that I'm in, I still don't feel as tired as I always do with my previous job. Attempts to smile and put on a friendly facade comes somewhat easy. Used to be that when I was really exhausted in my previous job, I would just slump in my mattress immediately after I reached home. Nowadays, when I reach home even though exhausted from work and hot weather, yet I feel excited to continue with my hobbies and relaxed after taking a shower. I always end up sleeping late since I usually fail to pull myself away from my computer. No matter. I'm not complaining a single bit since I'm getting extra cash with the added overtime work. Nothing to shout about though, since I always prefer to laze around than work.

So again I'm wondering, where's my bliss??? I can't find a time when I can truly relax myself. I wish I could travel. But with limited funds nowadays, I couldn't afford a holiday. How I envy the two friends of mine who went to China for awhile. I was suppose to go to China too!!! My family planned up a trip to do so early this year. Unfortunately they scrapped the plan once they heard about a bird flu epidemic going on in China and ever since still haven't planned up anything yet. They went to Hong Kong last year leaving me out of the picture :{ I wanna go to Hong Kong too!!! I guess I shouldn't complain that much since I went to Japan in 2003.

That was surely the best trip I had ever taken. I get to brush up my Japanese, I get to experience autumn season in Japan, I get to see Mount Fuji from a distance at Yokohama, I get to see a truly breathtaking view of Japan, I get to try various delicious authentic Japanese food, I get to experience 7 degrees celcius in Otaru, I got to visit the musical box factory, and so forth and so forth. How I wish that period would never end. After such experience, I am considering to return to Japan again!!! *sigh* Looks like that would still be a long way off for now cause I'm having difficulties financially, plus my parents don't like to to visit Japan. What a disappointment. Whatever. Hope the trip to China will be realized one day. Shanghai or Hong Kong or Beijing! AH, the thought of it just gets me excited. I wanna go back to Japan too. This time it will be Kyoto, or anywhere in the Kansai district area! Then will probably return to Hokkaido as well and visit the bears and get 白い恋人 (shiroi koibito , direct translation -----> white sweetheart!!!) a kind of biscuit which has chocolate in between. It was HYPER GOOD!!! I truly miss that.

Well, I can go on and on about Japan because I love the place so much. If only I was born there. If only I am able to live there (although too much of a good thing is no good). But till now, it's still very much a fantasy.
^v^ **~dream~**~dream~** ^v^